A Better Version of Me
Wednesday, March 30, 2005
Funny Kansas Wildflower of the Day
Stiff Goldenrod

Who names these flowers anyway? Ron Jeremy?

BULs on Parade
Bree, my wife, got promoted to a Business Unit Leader today. I think she could possibly be the youngest person ever to achieve such a title at the Kansas City Procter & Gamble plant. I'm so proud of her. She's an amazing worker. She inspires me to do my best at everything I do. Lord only knows that I need all the inspiration I can get sometimes. I tend to run out of steam over the long haul. I can take tests like nobody's business, but homework and other menial tasks have always been my downfall.

Que Syrah Syrah
Nothing makes my wife happier than a trip to the liquor store on 10% off wine Tuesdays. She was all smiles last night as we loaded up the car with a new mixed case of the red stuff. I'm not a huge wine guy, but I did manage to garner a couple of sixers of Sunshine Wheat and 90 Shilling to quench my occasional thirst.

Monday, March 28, 2005
Zum Gali Gali
Well, my wife's lone piano student, her young cousin Jack, had his first recital Sunday at our house. He did a swell job. I enjoyed his selection of short, traditional songs. I thought the name of his program should be, "Just Jack!," but that didn't fly with the event organizer, my wife. Hey, I thought it would be funny. Anyway, good job Jack. Keep up the good work.

Thursday, March 24, 2005
I Let 'Em Know
They say a boy is a boy, and a girl is a girl,
And Jason T., he is a blogger ready to rock world.
I am a man with a skill.
Ability to fulfill.
A worldwide reader's every wish,
Without the need to get ill.
No use to scream and to shout,
'Cause that's not what I'm about.
'Cause I'm a man who's rockin' a blog,
To this there is no doubt.
Continuing with my tales,
To never flap or to fail.
Be good to you,
Just like a discount at a one-day sale.
I'm not a criminal, or hood,
Neither the riff nor the raff.
If every blogger was a comic,
I'd be makin' you laugh.
If every blogger was a worker,
I'd be chief of the staff.
And on a scale of 1 to 10,
I am a 10 and a half.
If every blogger was a lion,
I'd be king of the beasts.
If every blogger was a cop,
I would be chief of police.
If every blogger was a soldier,
I would be Rambo.
If every blogger was Hawaiian,
I would be Don Ho.

Ok, I confess. I've been listening to a little Young MC lately.

Quiz Schmiz
Your Seduction Style: The Dandy
You're a non-traditionalist, not limited by gender roles or expectations.Your sexuality is more fluid than that - and you defy labels or categories.It's hard to pin you down, and that's what's fascinating about you.You have the psychology of both a male and a female, and you can relate to anyone.

What Is Your Seduction Style?

Via Petitedov

Jason's Ark
Due to the recent reemergence of the Canadian/American war of words and ideals in the blogosphere, I decided to build my own ark to fill with a select few Canadians before flooding that country and starting it anew. Here are my candidates for rescue.


1. Alanis Morissette
2. Gordon Lightfoot (This one's for you, dad.)
3. Sarah McLachlan
4. Paul Shaffer
5. Leonard Cohen


1. Wayne Gretzky
2. Steve Nash
3. Living offspring of James Naismith
4. Ferguson Jenkins
5. Jacques Villeneuve


1. Dan Aykroyd
2. Jim Carrey
3. Tommy Chong
4. Kiefer Sutherland
5. Eugene Levy


1. Pamela Anderson
2. Jill Hennessy
3. Neve Campbell
4. Catherine O'Hara
5. Carrie-Anne Moss


1. James Gosling
2. Linda Evangelista
3. Lorne Michaels

Any additions/subtractions you'd like to make to this list?

Saturday, March 19, 2005
I Can See Clearly Now, the Rain Is Gone
Well, so far I've picked the Vermont and Bucknell victories correctly. Too bad Creighton and Charlotte couldn't pull their weight. Charlotte's loss really hurts. I had them winning a couple more games. Overall, not too bad so far. I'm in the 99th percentile of Yahooers.


I'm now in 196th place overall, with 52 points. The leader has 59. I've still got 12 of the 16 teams and all of my potential Final Four teams are still alive. By the way, would I be correct in assuming that the number of potential combinations for filling out the NCAA tournament bracket, minus the qualifying game, would be 2^63, or 9.22 x 10^18? That's a whole lot of possible outcomes! That makes the probability of getting it exactly right very slim. Sorry, I've been studying for the first actuarial exam, so my mind is always in probability land.

Can I Get a 'Bucknell Yeah?!'
The Jayhawks lose in the first round for the first time in 27 years. How sweet it is!

Friday, March 18, 2005
I Always Thought English Professors Were a Little Off Their Rocker.
Kansas State English professor, Thomas Murray, convicted of first-degree murder for killing his ex-wife.

Stone Cold Buggin'
Now this rhyme right here has been dedicated,
to all rap fans that said that they hated,
the other MC's whose rhymes deviated,
'cause this is real gold, it's not gold plated.
A few years ago these rhymes were created.
I was real proud and very elated.
It took a long time as I calculated,
but now I look back, I'm glad I waited.
At so many times I was so frustrated,
'cause I couldn't finish up what I initiated.
I got mad and quite agitated,
and I remember rhymes that I had confiscated.
But one day, this girl, she perpetrated.
She was cute and quite educated.
We got married at once, and it was consumated,
but once it hit the books it was ill-fated.
She took me to court, to have it litigated.
A judge and a jury, that's how it operated.
The jury went away, and they deliberated.
Then she took all of my money, had my house renovated.
I felt so poor, and so humiliated,
because of a fight that I instigated,
but I got my money back, and I was jubilated,
'cause the first court decision was never validated.
For weeks and weeks, I just celebrated,
because the jury and judge recapitulated,
and all of my funds were never liquidated.
Yes I won, yes I dominated.
I saw another girl and my heart pulsated.
She looked just like that girl I mated.
Would have been part two of this rhyme that I've stated;
so I'll just go home and read my Sports Illustrated.

This is one of my favorite songs by Young M.C. He is definitely one of the best hip hop lyricists I've heard. Do you know of any other songs that carry the same rhyme throughout? I think that's pretty cool.

Tuesday, March 15, 2005
Chicken Little
I've been eatin' some fried chicken.
The food there is finger lickin'.
Those chicken legs are never far away.
I've been eatin' some fried chicken.
The food there is finger lickin'.
Eatin' at home just never will really be the same.
I've been eatin' some fried chicken.

Thanks to my neighborhood KFC and Alabama for inspiring my latest attempt at lyrical genius. Ha!

Monday, March 14, 2005
Rants Marching
Want a piece of the Madness? Then go to Yahoo's tournament page and fill out a bracket. You can join the private group I created, if you wish. This could be a blogger office pool of sorts. It's easy, all you need is a Yahoo ID. Here are the essentials needed for joining the group:

Group ID#: 78434
Password: peekaboo

So, come one, come all. Don't be shy. You don't really have to have a blog. There's room for 50 people. Filling out the bracket requires very little time. Too much thought never gets you very far in these pools anyway. Just go with your gut and click away. It'll only take a couple of minutes! Good luck.

La Sexorcisto
Anyone else out there like to workout to "Cosmic Monsters, Inc.," by White Zombie? Man, I could run all day long with that song playing. Actually, most of the songs on that album can get me goin'. When I get an iPod, that will be the first song I put on it. Right now I only have it on a crappy mix tape, since the CD I taped it from was stolen. Damn thieves!

Tiles and Tribulations
If you're in the mood for an entertaining documentary, go add Word Wars to your Netflix queue, pronto. You'll meet G.I. Joel (Hint: The G.I. doesn't stand for Government Issue), and other masters of the anagram, and follow them as they play Scrabble from Washington Square park all the way to the national Scrabble championship. I just watched this flick last night and I enjoyed it. Yeah, it's dorky, but sometimes dorky isn't such a bad thing.

Sunday, March 13, 2005
Happy Birthday Ari!
Please go wish Ari a happy birthday. She turned Grant Hill today. Or should I say Alonzo Mourning? She's also Allen Iverson standing next to Stephon Marbury. Anyway, she's cool. She ranks right up there with Jessica in the category of most interesting people I've never met.

Speaking of birthdays, and numbers, my birth number is 4, "The Conservative." My wife's is 8, "The Big Shot." Each respective category does a rather good job of describing our respective personalities and character traits. What's your number?

Lucy Liu

Just a couple quick pics of my new puppy and her favorite squeaky toy that she got for free from the vet.

Friday, March 11, 2005
Everybody Sing!
I know a spot that I love full well.
'Tis not in forest, nor yet in dell.
Ever it holds me with magic spell
I think of thee, Alma Mater.
K-S-U we'll carry the banner high.
K-S-U long, long may the colors fly.
Loyal to thee thy children will swell the cry,
Hail, Hail, Hail, Alma Mater!

Thanks for helping me support my team as they try, for the third time this year, to beat the Jayhawks tonight and keep their slim NCAA tournament hopes alive. The odds may be almost a million to one, but hey, that never stopped Lloyd Christmas!

Wednesday, March 09, 2005
One Last Trip Nugget
So I'm filling my car with petrol (props to my British readers, if you're out there) at a station in Great Bend, KS, on my way to Dodge City last Saturday when I realize I may have forgotten to pack my bag. I check the trunk and, sure enough, the bag is in absentia. Great, I'm in the middle of western Kansas with nothing but the pair of jeans and K-State t-shirt I'm wearing. Needless to say, I didn't think that outfit would go over well at a wedding. If you don't know western Kansas much, one is very lucky to find a town that has something in it besides a grain elevator. The COOPs are the only buildings that dot the horizon. Thankfully, Great Bend did have a Wal-Mart, being the relative metropolis that it is. I managed to find a dress shirt, khakis, tie, socks and undershirt for the grand total of $50, and I didn't look half-bad in them. Anyway, the crisis was averted, but it did manage to add some extra spice to make the trip extra tasty.

Tuesday, March 08, 2005
Speaking of National Parks
These are the states I have visited.

That's 21 in all, including the District of Columbia.

Here are my top five states I'd like to tour that I have not yet visited.
1. Alaska
2. Maine
3. Lousiana
4. Kentucky
5. Vermont

How many states have you visited? Which ones would you like to see? You can make your own map here.

Trippin' Weekend
As I posted earlier, I went to Dodge City last weekend to attend a wedding. Bree and I had a great time rediscovering the western half of the state. When we arrived in Dodge City on Saturday, we decided to visit historic Boot Hill.

Boot Hill is a detailed reconstruction of Dodge City during its bustling time as a Longhorn cattle shipping point. The museum is a very neat place full of information about Wyatt Earp, "Doc" Holliday, Bat Masterson and other famous lawmen and outlaws of the wild west.

I also read about the herd of approximately 4 million buffalo that used to call the land around Dodge City home. 4 million buffalo in a single heard! I can't even properly imagine such a scene. There are written accounts of cowboys and others who sometimes found themselves amongst this herd with nothing visible but buffalo for as far as the eye could see. Perhaps the more amazing fact is that this herd, along with the 65 million other buffalo in the midwest, was reduced to less than 1000 total in a 20 year period by buffalo hunters. Kinda sad. There are a few small buffalo herds still maintained by ranchers around Kansas, but the vast herds are definitely a thing of the past.

On our way back on Sunday, we spontaneously decided to take a small detour to Fort Larned after seeing a road sign. This fort is perhaps the best maintained, most original army fort remaining from the mid to late 1800's era. It was built to help protect the Santa Fe trail. Touring the actual buildings once inhabited by General George Custer and others from the Civil War period gave me some butterflies. We even got to see some actual ruts from the Santa Fe trail that have been preserved for all these years. Pretty cool!

Then, in the bookstore at Fort Larned, I found a national parks passport. Now I can get this little doohicky stamped, or "canceled", at every national park I visit. Here are my inaugural cancellations from Fort Larned and the Santa Fe trail.

Now I'm anxious to get more, and mad that I didn't have the book earlier in life when I was in New York City, Buffalo, the Grand Canyon, D.C. and other places. I missed out on so many cancellation stations! Now I just have to make return trips I guess. I think my next stop will be the Brown v. The Board of Education museum in Topeka. That's just a hop, skip and a jump from my door.

So, Kansas really does have some interesting sites to see. If your interest is piqued by any of these places, please come and visit. I'll give you a personal tour if you wish. What fun that would be!

Monday, March 07, 2005
You Got to Give the Credit Where It's Due
For those of you in the western and midwestern states, don't forget to check your free annual credit report. Due to a new law, everyone will be entitled to one free credit report from each of the three major credit bureaus per year. Sorry, if you live in the south, or the east, your time has not come just yet. But don't fret, everyone will be able to get a free report by September 1 of this year.

So go out and make sure your identity is still yours and yours only. I've found mistakes on my report before and they are not fun to deal with.

I Just Got the Heck Outta Dodge
My wife and I went to a wedding in Dodge City this past weekend. The trip was very enjoyable and we got to take in many parts of Kansas that a person can easily forget about. Kansas really is a neat place to live in many ways. I will elaborate on the trip when I have more time to concoct a story.

Friday, March 04, 2005
No Fair
Where are all the sugar mommas in this world of sugar daddies?

Timing is Everything (Just a Little Comic Relief to Prepare You for the Weekend)
Jack wakes up at home with a huge hangover he can't believe. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose!

Jack sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. Jack looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror, and notices a note on the table: "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping--Love you!"

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, "Son...what happened last night?"

"Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door."

"So, why is everything in such perfect order, so clean, I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?"

His son replies, "Oh THAT! ... Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, "Leave me alone, lady, I'm married!"

Neo-Nazis Dump Plans for Kansas City, KS, Headquarters
Good. These idiots are the last people I would want in my neck of the woods. Looks like they're aiming for Florida now.

Thursday, March 03, 2005
Close Only Counts in Horse Shoes and Hand Grenades
Well, my beloved Kansas State Wildcats lost to the Kansas Jayhawks in men's basketball for the 30th straight time last night. That's correct. Thirty frickin' straight! Dammit! The 'Cats have played many a close game lately, but they've lost almost all of them. Maybe the time has come for a coaching change. I don't know. I'd just like to see them get back to their winning ways of yesteryear sooner rather than later. I want to have a reason to get excited for basketball season again.

Tuesday, March 01, 2005
Salina, KS, Goes Global
The Virgin Atlantic Global Flyer recently took off a few hours from here, in Salina, Kansas. Salina was chosen for its massive, 2 1/2 mile long runway. The plane needed most of this runway just to take off since it was heavily burdened with fuel for its global round trip sans refueling. Look here if you're wondering where the plane, and its one man crew are at currently. They expect the trip to be completed by sometime Thursday.

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